For most of my life, I have been seeking and desiring a relationship; one that would last forever. I did not know what that would be like, who it would be with, or where it might lead. I am here today to share with you the journey that brought us to this wedding. It’s the story of love and the story of life. The story of Alyssa and Cody.
A few years ago I began my career in the field of computer science because of my love for math and science. My current job was a bit too far from my parent’s house, so I left the nest and moved to Parma. I felt like my life was going great with a new job and newfound independence, but something was missing. While at a conference for work in early 2020, my friend, and then coworker, Michael, asked me a question that forced me to look at my life. “Cody, you're a great guy (which meant a lot coming from him) why don’t you have a girlfriend?” I thought about it and gave a generic answer like “it's just not the right time, or the right girl just hasn't come into my life yet.” Michael responded. “When will the time be right? How do you expect to meet the right girl if you don’t put any effort into finding her?” He was right. I knew that my life seemed to be settling into place so I did not have a good excuse. His questions got me thinking more and more about finding someone to be with, but I just wasn’t ready to do something about it.
A few months later, I had a dream. You know those dreams where you wake up disappointed because it wasn't real? In this dream, a woman walked into my living room and was just standing there. I enveloped her in a hug. This was not a casual embrace, it was a hug that felt like home. That was it. That was the dream. And I was definitely disappointed when I woke up to find no beautiful woman standing in my living room. Although it wasn't real, it was a pivotal moment for me. It was time to do something.
Soon after my dream, the world shut down and I began working remotely. How is a single guy going to meet a single woman during an international pandemic? Dating apps of course. It was not my ideal way of meeting someone, but there didn’t seem to be another option. So I downloaded the apps. For those of you who don’t know how they work, you look at someone’s profile, and if you're interested, swipe right, not interested, swipe left. About the same time, my work began a health steps challenge, encouraging us to get outside and exercise. I would use my time on these walks to swipe through my dating apps. On June 19, 2020 I was walking a trail close to home and checking the matches on my phone. As usual, there were a lot of left swipes happening. But then, I saw a woman that could be my match. Not on my phone screen, but in reality. She ran past me on the left and said “hello.” Something about the way she said hello felt different. I had to talk to her, but she just kept running. I decided if I bumped into her again, I was going to strike up a conversation.
I strayed from my usual path, looking left and looking right, hoping to see her again. Then I saw her, this time we smiled at each other. I felt a spark and remember thinking she was so beautiful. But then I actually had to talk to her. I asked her, “How far are you running?” Casually jogging up beside her, I asked if I could join her on the rest of her run. I’m not sure if she said yes or not, but there I was, running beside her. While finishing off the run and arriving at her car, we chatted for a few minutes. We talked about where she went to college, her major, where she worked. You know, the typical things you would ask a stranger. I invited her on a run that Sunday with some friends. She was polite, but told me she had church on Sunday. At this point, I was starting to feel nervous that I was making it awkward, so I gave her my number, hoping that she would text me if she was interested and also hoping I didn't look like some creepy guy that wouldn't leave her alone. Also, I had forgotten her name.
I could not stop thinking about our conversation. I learned a few things about this girl: 1) She was a Christian; 2) She did not seem interested in me based on her polite dismissal of my running invitation; and 3) She actually enjoyed running…for fun. I was pleasantly surprised when she texted me a few hours later and even agreed to meet me and my friends for a run on Sunday- before church, of course. And more important than saying yes to the morning run, I found out her name when she stated it in her first text to me - Alyssa. After this second run together, I could not tell if she was interested in me, but my running buddies assured me she was with an encouraging “Dude, she’s totally into you. Who else gets up at the crack of dawn to join a group of four guys to go running in pitch black through the woods?”
My friends may have been right, but we did not begin dating. Instead we developed a friendship. One that consisted of running, bonfires, pickleball, hikes, walks, and conversations. But conversations with Alyssa were different. Her strong relationship with Jesus was evident. Our conversations became more and more centered around faith. I grew up attending church on Sunday mornings, Sunday evenings, and Wednesday evenings. Church was not optional. I memorized the verses, learned Bible stories, and played games. But all of this head knowledge did not change my heart. In college I was exposed to other faiths and was too busy and distracted to attend church anymore. The final straw was a professor who taught about the chaos and destruction caused by people and their religious beliefs. The religious part of my life eventually faded completely and I came to the conclusion that there could be a god but we don’t know and can’t know which god is the right one. Despite my brother Kenny’s efforts, I was not interested in talking about it. That was until I met Alyssa.
Alyssa invited me to PHBC. I was skeptical at first because I am someone who thinks with reason and logic and I thought that religion did not fit into either category. But I could tell it was important to Alyssa. Through attending church and watching Alyssa live out her fatih, I began to wrestle with my preconceived ideas about God which led me on a journey of researching and reading about the God of the Bible. My best man, Curtis, challenged me to actually read the Bible and learn about who Jesus is and what He did for me. I learned Christianity is not about earning your way to health, wealth, and prosperity; it's not about going to church or doing good things to get to heaven. It is the realization that we have separated ourselves from God, our loving Father, through our sins. How could a loving God allow such separation if He truly does love us? A good comparison is like going to court for a crime that was committed. A just judge won’t let someone walk because of their good reputation and stellar servitude. A just judge will give a proper punishment for the crime. So how does someone escape the wrath of a just God? They don’t. There is nothing that anyone can do. But there is something that was already done. The wrath of God has been satisfied. Here’s how it happened. God sent His son into this world and lived a sin free life. Jesus took the penalty of our sins by dying an excruciating death on the cross. Out of His love for us, God has offered us a way back to Him, forever. If we choose to follow Him, we will have: life, love, hope, meaning, joy, purpose, and peace. I don’t have a specific date that I claimed the Christian name but it had to have been sometime in September of 2020. The reliability of scripture, the historic analysis of the person of Jesus Christ, and the testimony of Jesus’ closest disciples has led me to this conclusion. That’s what’s different about Christianity. Jesus made a truth claim about himself and was able to prove it through His actions. All of Jesus’ disciples died for their belief in Him as the living truth. But they didn’t just die for a belief. That happens all the time- even still today. They all died claiming they have seen the miracles of Jesus and the biggest miracle of all, His bodily resurrection from the dead. Even to the point that they were willing to die with that claim which is exactly what happened. The Bible says if you confess Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.
As Alyssa and I continued to get to know each other over the next few months, I felt more certain that she was the woman I wanted to date because she is the nicest, sweetest, and kindest person I have ever met in my life. However, I had come to the conclusion that she only saw me as a friend. That was until she invited me over for dinner with her parents. I was able to see how she and her family interacted and it seemed like we all got along well. My hunch grew after I invited Alyssa and her parents to a virtual work Christmas party at my house. She even traded shifts to be there for it so I knew she probably felt something for me. Her parents left early and Alyssa and I stayed up very late talking. I finally worked up the courage to ask her what she thought of me. She said, “Well, I like you.” Silly me responded by saying, “Nice.” At the end of the night I circled back and said, “So, you like me, huh?” She replied, “not tonight.’ I was disappointed thinking she was not ready to date me. Come to find out, it was just late, and she just wasn’t ready to talk about it at that moment.
A few weeks later she stopped by my house after church to discuss our relationship status. I told her about the dream and asked her if she was my dream girl (pun intended) and officially asked if she wanted to be my girlfriend. Finally.. The moment I had been waiting for! Then she said, “I need to think about it.” I could not be that disappointed because we both used that time to pray about God’s will for us. A few days later we made it official after spending time in prayer with her parents. I was beyond thrilled to finally call her my girlfriend. The next year of dating was wonderful, and on January 16th of this year, we got engaged.
It’s clear from our story that decision making does not come easy for us which is why we’ll probably never be able to build a house together! Today marks exactly two years and two weeks since we met and in that time I have made the two best decisions of my life: accepting Jesus as my Savior and asking Alyssa to marry me. Neither decision came lightly. I am so thankful that Alyssa never said “I will date you if you become a Christian” because I was able to decide for myself to follow Jesus.
Ed and Lorraine, thank you for treating me so well. It is clear that your hope and joy comes from being filled with the Holy Spirit. The way you sacrifice and put others above yourself is remarkable and I am blessed to become a part of your family.
To my family, thank you for laying the foundation and giving me some of the necessary fundamentals on how to live a life towards honoring God. I couldn’t be more grateful for all of your support and encouragement that you have provided.
Alyssa, meeting you in the park that day was no mere coincidence. I believe God placed us on that path for a reason. I love you so very much and am ready to spend the rest of my life with you. I’m excited for all the memories we will create living life together. I’m looking forward to starting our own family and being blessed with the children that God will give us and the family we will establish.
My journey to love led me to find new life through the Gospel of Jesus. The marriage we are celebrating today is a picture of Jesus and his bride, the church. How great would it be to celebrate an addition to His church today. Check out some of the resources that helped me see my need for Jesus. Alyssa and I both hope that they will also help you too.